Yet another fine example of one of my pet peeves/obsessions…Women’s Bodies Squished or Compressed.. It is new and novel that they just stuck the Vulva in the middle of her torso where here stomach or spleen or something* should be.
And as indicated this is clearly molded DIRECTLY from Kendra Lust.. who somehow manages to still be alive despite having a vagina where her lungs* should be.
Sigh… if only all women were shaped like this…..
*Whatta I know about anatomy! I went to art school..
Ah finally.. the only parts of women that actually matter in one convenient place.
I am kind of obsessed with boobs and vulvas smashed together.
It is just so WRONG. Grotesque and yet somehow sexy to enough men to make the manufacturing of them worthwhile.
Personally I think this makes just about the same amount of sense:
You can read more about the boobvulva here. This website is full of amazing things to put your penis in. The even have scientific looking cutaway shots of the innards of their Love Dolls.
Oh man I was almost done and then I found this awesome sleeve with MULTIPLE VULVAE on one blob!! So wrong.. so very wrong…
What the fuck is that thing? Glad you asked!
This is the Tongue Star Pleasure Tongue Vibe made by the fine folks at Hott Products, makers of many crappy sex toys and OMG I hate it!
“Strategic design and contoured shape by a leading orthodontist…this amazing pleasure tongue vibe has an Ultra-Comfort fit directly onto the teeth and causes virtually no discomfort or vibration to the mouth or teeth while doing so.”
LIES! And questionable grammer!
Ok maybe they got some third-rate orthodontist to weigh in on this but let me tell you the rest is lies! (and I wonder about the qualifications of that orthodontist.. I mean, if flossing too much is bad for you, how can this NOT be bad for you).
The vibration is laughable. The material is super sketchy and when you jam this doodad in your face, not only does it cause uncomfortable teeth chattering vibrations (contrary to the claims of this high-class orthodontist), but doing anything else sexy with your pie hole is pretty much out of the question. I get it, everyone is looking for a better or easier blowjob (or lick-job), but this is just not going to cut it as I cannot for the life of me imagine this enhancing anyone’s oral skills.
And can I just add that I never, ever want “causes virtually no discomfort” to be a bar set in the sex toy industry. Sex toys should cause absolutely NO discomfort. Ever. They are made to be fun. Sex is supposed to feel good. Let’s aim higher people!
Goddamn my fucking mouth still hurts from that crap.
“The deep oral canal is lined with tiny ribs that feel great when lubed up. Face fuck her as hard as you want and for as long as you like without her choking or gagging. When you’re ready to finish, blow your load inside her mouth and watch her swallow every drop!”
Because that is what women are made for…
Some days I am just overwhelmed with how many headless lady fuckable toys there are out there. They even went as far as a neck here but just gave up at the head, I guess. Sigh.
Also this is 27″ long so have fun stashing that under your bed…